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Thursday, April 23, 2009

[Edit]omg i just read this really ancient past entry on my blog about how i had an emotional outburst at poor posef and i realized it was very very similar to poor sl. haha like i think i always misdirect my frustration at poor innocent people. it was exactly the same how it happened then. like posef would suan me and i'd not care usually. but that day was just so bad. i still remember what made me so ... in the first place. but oh no. i really shouldn't have brought it out on him. ahhhh i realize i haven't really changed much. i still bottle up. and when there's too much inside of me, i explode on totally random innocent bystanders >< ... haha i remember the last time round, wz threatened to bomb posef with juice for pissing me off until i convinced her it wasn't his fault really. this time round... the same thing happened didn't it ): the suaning was the last straw that made me blow up. i'm so grateful everyone's being so nice about it. embarrassing >< [/edit]

almost almost done with my essay. but just needed to say. i miss jingru!! ): haha i am so lonely here in unilodge without jingru to keep me company.

i have to admit, it's really amazing how God placed me in the midst of such nice people. and provided me with them just as I needed them. i have my usual trusted select few back home in singapore (i miss you all so much). here, i've found confidantes in people, some of whom i least expected. but that's another story for another time. people appreciation post another time.

it's such a dreary day today. looking out of my window just depresses me because of the rain and the grey skies. kinds of reminds me of me and him. before everything went awry. don't think i've actually told anyone the whole story, even after yesterday's sharing, i think i've only revealed the tip of the iceberg. but then again, that's because some memories are better left alone. even though there was lots of hurt (and i think i caused him lots of grief too), i'd like to stop telling everyone about the bad stuff. some day i should share about the good stuff too. so that i can remember more about the happy times and just live and let go.


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at |2:46 PM|