Tuesday, August 19, 2008

this made me feel alot better.

Lord You seem so far away
A million miles or more it feels today
And though I haven't lost my faith
I must confess right now
That it's hard for me to pray
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give the grace
With all that's in my heart

I will sing I will praise
Even in my darkest hour
Through the sorrow and the pain
I will sing I will praise
Lift my hands to honor You
Because Your Word is true
I will sing

Lord it's hard for me to see
All the thoughts and plans You have for me
But I will put my trust in You
Knowing that You died to set me free
But I don't know what to say
And I don't know where to start
But as You give grace
With all that's in my heart

I will sing

mable blogged
at |7:42 PM|

if everyone cared, and nobody cried
if everyone loved, and nobody lied
if everyone shared and swallowed their pride
then we'd see the day when nobody died

thankyou God for friends who give me the courage to dare hope that this world is not as ugly as it seems. but please God, how much longer must this go on?

mable blogged
at |6:57 PM|

Monday, August 18, 2008

there are moments in time that i wish i could return too. but time itself is a fearful enemy. it blurs the sharp edges of anything and everything that means so much to me. i don't think i've ever felt happier since then. i'm craving for answers, reassurance, encouragement, security; anything at all that can help me feel that this is not the end.

why can't time just stop when i want it too.

mable blogged
at |4:05 PM|

so at the end of the day, there's no one you can truly trust in this world, not even the ones closest to you. Is that it? Is that all there is to life?

I know that when God doesn't answer my prayers it's not because He doesn't care. And that there must be some reason for such suffering even if I can't see it now. But I can't help asking, "Why now, Lord? Why does all this have to happen now?"

I really feel as though I'm on the brink of something. One slight push might really send me plummeting down, down into that dark abyss of whatever lies down there. I simply don't care anymore.

How does one hope when there seems to be none left in this world? How does one cling on to faith when all else fails? Is there anyone out there who even cares?

And at the end of the day, will You be there to catch me when I fall, Lord?

The one thing I ask of the Lord—
the thing I seek most—
is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life,
delighting in the Lord’s perfections
and meditating in his Temple.
For he will conceal me there when troubles come;
he will hide me in his sanctuary.
He will place me out of reach on a high rock.
...Hear me as I pray, O Lord.
Be merciful and answer me!
My heart has heard you say, “Come and talk with me.”
And my heart responds, “Lord, I am coming.”
Do not turn your back on me.
Do not reject your servant in anger.
You have always been my helper.
Don’t leave me now; don’t abandon me,
O God of my salvation!
Even if my father and mother abandon me,
the Lord will hold me close.
- Psalm 27:4-5, 7-10

mable blogged
at |3:07 PM|

Saturday, August 16, 2008

Sometimes I really wonder if there’s any hope left for this family. Every time I think there seems to be a glimmer of hope, everything falls apart before there’s time to wish for more.

I’m tired. On days like these, I wonder why I even bothered to get out of bed.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-30

mable blogged
at |9:24 AM|

Monday, August 04, 2008

having to start school seems very surreal. (especially the fact that it's uni and hence a new environment, new social circle, new everything... ARGH). okay i'm just a person very resistant to change i suppose. and it's just a strange feeling to watch everyone fly off (or prepare to fly off) to different corners of the Earth to embark on their own journeys into becoming university students.

terrible. soon our youths are going to slip away before we know it. and we'll become members of the society and obliged to contribute to the nation's GDP.

oh alrite i'm being strangely emo/high at the same time because i'm sleepy. and also cos i watched the money no enuff 2 movie today and it made me leave the theatre feeling terrible at how horrible people can be. sigh i hope not all of society is like that. cos if it is, then i really wonder what the world is coming to.


it's strange being at a coming-of-age kind of time because it really makes you wonder how everything is going to turn out and then again sometimes i just want to believe that the world really isn't such an ugly place. perhaps some time in the future i'll be able to look back on such entries and laugh at the childishness of everything. but for me, right now, all i can do is have faith, and trust that even if everything doesn't turn out as how i pictured it to be, at least i know He'll be there for me.

mable blogged
at |1:50 AM|