Monday, October 30, 2006

the reason why his music is so beautiful: when he plays the piano, his whole heart and soul is in the music. every key his fingers hit; every note that he plays; every chord he harmonises - he is part of it all. he becomes part of the instrument, rather than just a performer playing on the piano. there is a difference in being part of the music, and merely being a rehearsed performer. a rehearsed performer knows what he's supposed to do (and he knows it very well), but he is nevertheless not part of the music and hence being a separate entity, you don't enjoy his music as much. but for someone who is really immersed in the music he creates, watching and hearing him play (the piano, in this case) is enough to move you. this reminds me of what mr oura taught us last time: when you put the mouthpiece into your mouth, you must become an extension of your clarinet (or whatever instrument you're playing), so that you really feel the music. this is why i love music (: music is something i can really lose myself in. and music is a lovely way to praise/worship God.

hm i don't suppose anyone would really understand my gibberish above. but hah that's what i really felt when he played that song last time, just that i never actually penned it down.

i've managed somehow to start talking(online) to people i haven't spoken to in eons. it's cool. i miss them so much i kinda wish i were sec 4 again cos that was when i talked to them like 24/7 even though the time difference btwn Singapore and there is like at least 5 hours i think. in fact that was when i was crazy over livejournaling and i spent every single day chatting with livejournal friends. but i recognize the fact that that part of my life is over. but God blessed me with it (no matter how short-lived it was) and i'm already thankful for that..

oh and i want to see a rainbow again. (: i was looking at my Japan photos and saw the photo i took of the rainbow we saw. it's beautiful. God made so many beautiful things in this world.

alright. i'm going offline. tc.

mable blogged
at |10:27 PM|

Thursday, October 26, 2006

wow the school term has officially ended. it's quite a weird thought i think. but hey, i actually survived the first year in JC (: haha i'm not looking forward to being JC2 at all. not one bit. but who knows, it might not turn out as bad as i expect. afterall i was really really dreading sec 4 too, and it turned out that my sec 4 year was one of the years in which i learned the most things and also one of the times i treasure most. yeaaa good old secondary school days XD haha and besides, with God to guide the way, haha i shouldn't have anything to fear. (:

watched "death note" and "the prestige", both of which i enjoyed very much (: i liked the way both movies had rather intricate plots. and i really dont know why people criticized tatsuya fujiwara's acting. =/ i thought he was ok (from my pov) and the plot for "death note" was really cool; the way he planned out everything. raito/light/whatever-he's-called (i dont read the manga) is really quite a genius (though a little inhumane) to have planned everything. but shhhh i shan't include anymore spoilers. i also liked the plot for "the prestige". it was so full of the ugly sides of human nature, and quite dark if you think more into it. but yea there was such a cool twist in the ending that really quite took me by surprise. very nice :) haha i watched "deathnote" with sichen but watched "the prestige" by myself (because i was feeling anti-social and rebellious then). i discovered that watching movies by yourself can be quite nice, but only if you're in the correct mood. if not, it's better to just stick to watching movies with other people.

okay... my arms hurts from my jabs (vaccinations). both arms hurt la. owww. shall end off here then. i'm tempted to say: ではね... :p (cos that's how i've been ending off alot of my e-mails lately. lol)

mable blogged
at |10:31 PM|

Sunday, October 22, 2006

i'm so whiny. tsk. but even though i whine about so many things, i guess deep down i know i'm really very blessed. God blessed me with a really wonderful sister. (: and she's really the best person i can gush over stuff with. i guess i never really realised the extent of my appreciation for her until she flew overseas to study... but at least there's still telephones and e-mails <33

have been spending time resting in God's prescence. it's really refreshing and it makes me think deeper. i never really thought about it before, but i guess everyone has a reason for doing bad (i.e. annoying/irritating/evil) stuff at times. there must have been a past to it, or at least his/her side to the story. finally i can come to terms with so many things and finally find it in me to forgive and forget.

そういえば... コーちゃん、おめでとう！！ あたしは、いつも君を応援するよ！頑張って。(^0^)

oh yes and i've really enjoyed watching tv with my mum and playing board games with my brother and dad. i feel like i'm a kid again. ママと一緒に『ロンド』をみました。(笑) 速水もこみちはドラマに、とてもとてもこわくいよ。but he acted quite well. haha and i spotted ウエンツ英士's guest appearance too. it was quite funny actually. he only showed his face for like 5 seconds -_-

okies.. gonna go e-mail ppl ^__^
じゃ。

mable blogged
at |12:39 PM|

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

i love this song (不死之身 by 林俊杰). it's one of my favourite songs... although i'm not very sure if the song (and lyric) writer(s) implied what i think this song implies. but if it does, the lyrics go much deeper than romantic love. i think it goes down to the purest love possible. and if it doesn't (which would mean i'm just reading too much into the song), oh well at least it's still a really nice song. i liked the way he sang it cos he sounds like he's really putting alot of feeling into it. (: if only i were blessed with the talent of writing lyrics and music haha. i'd write a song for Him right now. Jesus' love really does heal. i just pray for God to draw me closer to Him such that when (or rather, IF) the time comes, i wanna confidently trust in the Lord with all my heart, no matter how impossible the circumstances seem.

anyways i watched "world trade centre" over the weekend... and cried for about three quarters of the movie. it was an extremely powerful film that really touched me and made me think alot. i think that it's alarming/amazing what humans are capable of (both the good and the bad). i haven't watched such a moving film in a really long time. so i feel vaguely satisfied, having cried to my heart's content. hmm not that i wanted to cry. but yea i like crying over good books and/or films.

Lord, help me sense Your urgency; help me to do what You want me to do. Lord I pray for Your will to unfold in my life, and for me to simply listen out for Your voice. Indeed Lord I pray for a heart of compassion such that I will have the eagerness and the zeal to share Your word with all those around me. Let me not fall to my temptation once more, and help me to simply draw closer to You.

mable blogged
at |6:57 PM|

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Sigh.. My phone is seriously on the verge of spoiling. It keeps turning off by itself. And when it actually stays on, it doesn't vibrate so i keep missing calls. Yesterday i missed a grand total of seven calls because my phone was on silent mode and didnt vibrate the whole afternoon.

oh anyway, guess where i am now.. ;) i'm in my dad's car. Hehe i'm using my brother's 3G phone. It's so cool la. I can't believe i'm actually typing an entire blog entry with a handphone in my dad's car. Haha. At times like this i love technology :)

anyway i went for cell today. I love cell. But today's word kind of freaked me out and at the same time spoke to me. Cos we were discussing Jesus's 2nd coming and how He commanded us to stay firm to the end and to make disciples of every nation. I really pray that God will lead me to serve Him in the way He thinks is best for me. This few days, God has been giving me verses that tell me to entrust Him with everything, even my dreams and hopes. And that i shouldn't worry about them, cos when i seek Him first, He will take care of everything for me. :) (1 Peter 5:7.)

alright.. Shall end off here :)

mable blogged
at |8:02 PM|

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

[very long post]
sigh at times i wonder if everything was just one big mistake. but it's a little late for regrets now. like haha the year is almost over mable!!! wake up!! sometimes i'd really like to ask God "whyy?" but yup i know I must trust and have faith that He is in control somehow. What lies in the future; what i wanna do after JC... I know that He has it all planned out. And I've made so many mistakes before by not trusting Him. So this time round, I'm just gonna relax and take things easy, trusting that He is in control and will definitely lead me through. (: and wheee today I made a promise to God.

anyways i've finally finished watching the kim san soon tv serial. it was really realistic and not at all cliched. and yea there were really moments that made me cry while the funny bits were really quite ... -_-;; haha. getting hooked on tv serials once in awhile is quite nice. but i shouldn't over do it. (: it might just become an obsession like my crazy obsession over johnnys last year lol and the week so far has really been quite enjoyable:D

1. PW oral presentation was actually alot better than i expected. my group rox la :D everyone was so pro and mag made such lovely slides that the teacher was impressed (: i really thank God that throughout the whole course of the project our group didnt really face any major problems or any times where we got into arguments and everything. it's really something I'm grateful for.. and yea it has really been fun working with such responsible and fun people. (:
2. and during econs tutorial mr.teo let us watch friends... though i didnt really enjoy it, i must admit it was quite nice to have a break from usual lessons. and yea some parts were quite funny in a very =____= way.
3. ooh and we got to watch quite cool videos for chemistry. especially CSI :):) haha that used to be one of my favourite shows on tv. like in sec 2 or something. haha so long ago!! i miss being sec 2.
4. i'm starting to be abit less anti-social again. had quite alot of fun talking to people and getting to know them more.. i dunno it feels nice to laugh over the same things, talk about the same things, and sometimes just feel like a part of something. maybe it's the desire each and everyone of us has to feel accepted? i guess i still miss the way things used to be. but time goes on and eventually i need to learn to face up to reality.
5. oh and i'm so ambivalent. i need to make a stand.
   

oh wells. getting back the papers next mon. quite nervous/worried/apprehensive. and promos results aside, i have so many things going through my mind. i dont really know how to talk to anyone about it. but yup Jesus knows my heart. i think i need some serious tawg (time alone with God) and let Him help me to sort out my feelings. alrite. i guess i'll end off here

mable blogged
at |2:03 PM|

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust Him more!

O how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
And in simple faith to plunge me
’Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, ’tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.

I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee,
Precious Jesus, Savior, Friend;
And I know that Thou art with me,
Wilt be with me to the end.

I'm learning to take Him at His word and to simply rest on His promises. Old emotional wounds keep resurfacing la. but Jesus heals :)

haha i miss my sister... but she sounds like she's having a great time at waseda :) her new (best?) friend is called yusuke and he sounds super funny. haha and he's her senpai so she keeps using keigo with him. then he keeps on going like "dameeee-! keigo ha dame yo!" -_- my goodness he sounds like a funnier version of kousuke. (:

mable blogged
at |8:47 PM|

Saturday, October 07, 2006

oh dear the haze is getting really bad! the psi index is like a hunded and twenty something i think. was a little whiny this morning cos the smoke smell was really strong. but then honestly, i really shouldn't be whining. can you imagine, if the air here is so bad, what kind of air ppl in indonesia have to breathe?

oh dear and my sister called yesterday to tell us about the rainy season in Japan. woah typhoons!! sounds really exciting cos her umbrella got blown away and her shoes were entirely soaked. i love the rain. but sigh i dont think i'd wanna be caught in a typhoon.

anyway... (: i love gek and minky. <33333 love them to bits. :):):) haha

gtg

mable blogged
at |7:20 PM|

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

hello blog! long time no see!

haha this is a nightmare. i haven't touched my (e-mail) inbox for really long... and now i'm flooded with lots of stuff like meetings/stuff i'm supposed to do. and oh dear oh dear. =/

oh well. i like the rain but not the haze. (: and i've been spending alot of time with my mommy <3 i love talking to mommy.

random stuff aside, this post is just an attempt to not let this blog die. (: but i've kinda lost touch and lost interest in blogging at the moment. funnily though throughout the promos period, i kept having weird impulses to blog. and i really thought very deeply about stuff i wanted to blog. but oh well. once those moments are over, they're over. you most likely wont feel like blogging about them anymore.

thanks to everyone who met up in the mornings to pray before every paper :) and of course thanks to my sis who called back from Japan to pray over the phone with me regularly... and for kousuke who also risked his phone bill by calling from Japan as well with a supply of puns and prayers :) you guys were awesome

wheee. i've been bumming around for the past few days :) went out to watch a movie with mag, sichen and weiyi. haha gosh i dont like violent movies. but the plot was quite interesting.

oh alrite. i've run out of stuff to say. goodbye blog. till next time :)

mable blogged
at |2:17 PM|