Friday, July 28, 2006
gargh i think i'm like a really horrible and mean person when i'm cranky. like when i get mood swings, whoever comes my way will really get snapped at la. then today i said alot of mean things and uttered alot of brainless comments. and although i didn't intend to hurt/insult/piss off alot of people, i guess i did. so i'm really sorry. ):
it's really quite amazing that even a sinner like me can deserve God's grace and care. today during bible studies, Frieda discussed Ephesians 1:3-8 ... and i was really quite astounded la.
"For he chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted as His sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with His pleasure and will - to the praise of His glorious grace which He has freely given us in the One He loves. In Him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God's grace that he lavished on us with all wisdom and understanding." -
Ephesians 1:4-8the fact that Jesus came and paid for all our sins once and for all, that He cancelled the debt. It never ceases to amaze me how much He was willing to pay and sacrifice for such a horrible, mean, flawed, sinner I am. it didn't matter to Him how tattered and torn I used to be, because He loved me, and the moment I received Him into my life, He's cancelled that debt. I think this is really a timely reminder for me because it made me recall that feeling of falling in love with Him for the very first time. I really need to make a stand right now. God comes before everything else. (:
and if i should stray off just abit, Father I pray that you lead me back to You again. anyway so much for hiatus. i'm back just one day after i said i'd go on hiatus -_- but that's just how ironic things are. when i don't decide to go on hiatus, i can't be bothered to blog. and when i decide to, bloggable events just spring up infront of me. sigh. but yea suddenly i'm getting this feeling of deja vu. cos i'm becoming closer to _____ and _____ again. just like in the past. (: i just hope it lasts. anyway i'm going to miss frieda ): she's really just so amazing and i've really learnt alot from her. i just thank God for sending her to guide me for these few months.
maybe i should stop trying to take things into my own hands. it only makes things worse. i should have left it all to Him but I didn't. pride made me think i knew what i was doing. i hope this serves as a lesson learnt once and for all and that i will never commit such a stupid act ever again.
I'm sorry Lord for the thing I've made it, when it's all about You...
mable blogged
at |10:55 PM|
